I think things are finally settling down here. Sure, I am busier than I have ever been, there are never enough hours in the day and Callen has a black eye, but the new rhythm of our lives is finally coming together for me. Two of my favorite things that have come together since school started are that Jack and I pick out all of his school clothes for the week each Sunday night. Jack doesn’t care much about what he wears so this is an extremely easy process that speeds up the morning routine for us. The other thing is that my close friend and neighbor, Tracey, has been making my life so much easier. She and I have an awesome carpool schedule and if something comes up, she is there for me whenever possible and vice versa. Thank goodness for the help of other moms and friends…we get it and look after each other. Before I had kids, I could have never imagined how important these relationships would be and how much they would help maintain my sanity.
Okay, sappy stuff is over (for now). Yesterday after the church service, I picked up Callen in his Sunday school room, Cowpoke Junction. He and I then went upstairs to get Jack from his Sunday school room. After we got Jack, he said he had to use the bathroom and ran off down the hall. Callen was doing something that distracted me and when I looked up, Jack was gone. I assumed Jack had gone to the upstairs bathroom not far from us so Callen and I went there to wait by the bathroom door for him. He was in there for a few minutes so I sent Callen in to check on him. Then Callen was in there for a few minutes and I had to go check on him. I had to go through one door of the men’s bathroom which led to a small hallway and then go through another door that opened to the bathroom. (I was surprised how clean it was in there). Anyway, when I opened the door, I found Callen standing on a stool wetting his hair and “making his hair handsome”. When I asked about Jack, he said “he’s not here”. Panic hit me immediately…where the heck was Jack????? I had to drag Callen out because he did not get how scary this situation had just become; he was still very much focused on this hair. So I get him out and head back toward the direction of our car and his classroom. Finally I see Jack standing by the glass doors looking out into the parking lot at our car. It turns out that he had gone downstairs to use the main bathroom which is a bit of a walk away from where we were. Jack told me he was waiting by the glass doors so he would be able to see us if we went out to the car (as if we would leave without him). He’s a smart kid and I was happy with the way he handled not knowing where I was. He went to the one spot where he would be able to see me and be seen from a few different directions. I’m not sure if this was a parenting success or failure, but everything worked out fine…thankfully!
Okay, more sappy stuff. Today is 9/11 and I feel compelled to acknowledge this day here. We all remember that day and where were. The question of where we were on 9/11 has replaced “where were you when Kennedy was shot?” and before that there was “where were you when Pearl Harbor was attacked?” Although these kinds of nation-changing events don’t happen very often, they leave in their wake a severe sense of sadness, loss, fear, and a million “what ifs”. As bad as we are wounded by these events, they also leave in their wake a sense of unity in our country, a sense of duty, and eventually, a nation that can heal and recover from such unimaginable tragedy. I can look back on that moment in time and see myself standing in the administration office of my building on Naval Station Norfolk when I heard the news about that first plane. It’s easy to get stuck in that moment because it’s a clear mark of before and after. Just before that moment, as far as I knew, everything was fine. After that moment, things would never be the same. Shortly after that moment, the magnitude of what was happening would hit us all like a sledgehammer. Focusing on the bad is so much easier than focusing on the good, so, on this day, 9/11/11, I choose to focus on the good things that have changed in my life since that day: I married a wonderful man, have two wonderful sons, and a happy and full life. All of these things can exist at the same time as the sadness I feel for the events of that day ten years ago. I don’t have to give up one to have the other.
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